Today was interesting, I knew the weekends would be harder with this diet as there it not routine to the day, and often I’m out with friends.
This weekend I also had a friend’s birthday party, which was reflective of a childhood party with lots of chocolates and sweets and nibbles. We all got dressed up and had lots of fun. I had known this day was coming so I had planned it as my treat meal, allowing myself some leniency with the food. What I hadn’t expected was the lack of guilt that came with eating the chocolates and cookies. I didn’t gorge myself, but a had a few sweet treats and some savory ones. My only though was, well I just want to have fun, and there was no guilt. I feel guiltier eating the fat free ice-cream at night then I did eating sugar laden cookies. The only thing that stopped me eating more was that I had to go straight from the party to a 1 ½ hour corrie class and didn’t want the food to come back up while spinning round the pole.
This lack of concern does worry me a little, if it was so easy for me to eat junk food today, how easy will it be for me to do it again. Or to do it every day. “It just a little thing”, I’d tell myself, “it won’t hurt”. But that’s when the bad habits come back to haunt us.
So tomorrow I’m going to have to be extra good and I don’t think I’ll plan for treat meals next week. Not until I can control the part of my brain that doesn’t care what goes in my body and replace it with something that thinks before it eats.
Breakfast: A slice of toast with vegemite, and coffee
Snack: a carrot
Lunch: Party Food
Dinner: Chicken zucchini, carrots, leaks, baby potatoes
Supper: fat free ice-cream
One and a half hour corrie pole class