How to be the Perfect Pole Partner.
10 things You Need to Know.
It’s hard out there for a pole dancer. On the one hand, we know that our work ethic, self confidence, toned body and passion for dance makes us a sought after catch, with some serious bragging rights for the guys. Pole dancing is a sport that attracts women who are ballsy, can laugh at themselves, and who develop a great sense of body awareness. On the other hand, strip clubs have poles in them, so we know that “pole dancer” can be secret code for “stripper” for the ignorant.
Still, when something’s a big part of your life, you kind of have to tell people. I always feel that honesty is the best approach, and I’m more than proud to be involved in (and an ambassador for) this amazing sport. When you tell a stranger that you’re a pole dancer it is a form of litmus test as to how switched on they are. If their tongue starts hanging out you know you are dealing with a redneck. Walk away. But if they can maintain enough self control to at least pretend they’re curious about pole as a sport, they’ve got my attention.
So, here are 10 things your Future Potential Girlfriend Who Pole Dances would like you to understand. Study carefully!
1. She’s really proud of those bruises
She will get bruised a lot, and in some pretty awkward places, so get good at hiding your horror and repulsion. Also remember that they are painful. We in the pole community call them pole “kisses” and consider them a badge of honour, so just be cool and pass her the arnica gel.
2. She probably won’t notice if she’s doesn’t have her legs covered
We need skin for grip (skin sticks, fabric slips), so booty shorts to us are like swimsuits for Olympic divers: a uniform. Don’t be surprised if your girl wanders around the house between practice sessions in hot pants, she’s not doing it as a come on.
3. She desperately wants to teach you something
She’s a pole addict and has her own pole set up at home. She’ll spend hours practising on it. She would like you to be involved. Let her do it. And make a big fuss over how hard it is. It is hard to make a move look easy and effortless. Right? The only way you could impress her more would be if you took up pole classes too! Miss Fit Dance Studios offer FaST Boyz pole fitness classes for guys – check it out.
4. If she wants to show you a trick, don’t make it about her body
As with the booty shorts, the sexy aspect of pole is something we stop noticing after repeated exposure. We love that you think we’re cute, but really, if we’re trying to show you this trick we worked on for four hours, don’t fixate on anatomy. Please. Just watch the trick. Exception: telling her that she’s got a 6 pack is always welcome!
5. Pole is not a sex thing, so stop trying to make that happen
You’ll know if we’re trying to seduce you. Promise. Frankly after a pole workout sex is probably the last thing on our mind. Hope for a pole free day (-:
6. Don’t expect us to know how to give lap dances
Pole Dancing does not equal lap dancing. Lap dancing, just like any other skill, needs to be learnt and practised, it doesn’t just happen. If your girl offers you a lap dance thank your pole god.
7. But when it does come to sex stuff, brace yourself
It’s a confidence thing.
8. Massages are not an “extra,” they’re a necessity
Pole dancers ALWAYS have sore muscles, so a massage is ALWAYS welcome! You’ll get sick of hearing us talking about how sore we are, so try to remedy the problem.
9. For the most part, we’re totally normal girls
The more you can treat pole like any other interest, the happier and more comfortable we’ll feel having you in our lives.
10. You may end up as a pole widow
Just accept that your girl will be spending lots of time at her pole studio and will want to hang out with her pole buddies from time to time. And eventually, you will become blasé about watching her do tricks unless you get involved!
Now go forth and be a PPP!
Sarah Thompson, AKA Miss Fit